Couple Relationship Issues
Every relationship experiences issues and pressures. These can include:
Arguments. What causes them? Many things.
One reason can be by not talking about issues before they build up.
Did you know that arguments often are not always about what you think they are. There may be something else that’s troubling one or both of you. Arguments about whose turn it was to load the dishwasher are often about deeper issues you haven’t been able to express, such as anger or sadness.
The big issue that is important to any relationship is trust and when trust breaks down between couples it is difficult to restore the relationship.
The spiritual has a part to play in any life issue. Prayer can help restore relationships. By praying about the argument and what part we played we get a new perspective. We often find we need to say sorry as we bring any pride and hurt to God for healing.
Communication. The more important a relationship is the more we can misunderstand and find all sorts of barriers come up between us. Getting help from a mediator or counsellor can help with understanding and listening to the other’s point of view.
Traumas.
Sex.
Feeling stuck and/or no longer feel “in love”.
Family Pressures
Family Relationship Issues
My aunts were close but stopped speaking. What happened? The problem may have been a reaction to the death of my grandmother, and the disposal of her possessions. Families are not perfect, and relationships can be complicated. I was sad to see the loss of the close, sisterly relationship they’d both once enjoyed. As I grew up, I was told, “life is too short to hold grudges”, a great idea but hard to for them to put into practice.
Do you find family difficult? Those misunderstandings can easily happen with those who are close, and you can look back and wonder what the cause of the falling out was and how you can undo the things that you’ve said. Perhaps the issue goes deeper, and you feel a family member has left you feeling unsupported, or unvalued. Do you ever feel that family is not the safe place you want or need it to be? Those who know us best can push our ‘hot buttons’ so easily and put our defences up. Is your normal reaction to family disagreements to either take a stand and fight or retreat and not say anything? What else could you do and how could faith help?
God knows your situation, whatever it is, and loves you greatly. He’s given us examples in the Bible to guide and help us in knowing how to live our lives. For example, the story of Joseph and his treatment by his brothers illustrates how a dysfunctional family finds healing and hope.
Why not turn to God and see the difference this makes? Pray about your feelings and the hurtful things that were said. Jesus understands because he also faced relationship issues. Even his closest friends ran away at the point he needed them the most.
Some local churches are very friendly and could help, support, and encourage you. One woman I knew told me about the church she’d found and how it had become her new family, a place where she felt safe and belonged. To find your local church see www.christianity.org.uk/find-a-local-church For a Christian counsellor, see www.acc-uk.org